And Forever After
by dodheanta
Summary: Just a fanfiction about the lives of our favourite wizards after the war. I'll try to cover as much characters as possible, but it will mostly be based on the Weasleys. It shows how they get over their losses and go on with their lives. Strictly canon.


Note: This is NOT a Harry/Ginny fanfic! It just starts with Harry and Ginny, because I love them so much, but I'm not going to focus on them. This is fanfic about the post-war life of our favourite wizards.

_**Chapter one  
Let me Fall, I Don't Care if I Break Down...**_

Ginny rested her head on her brother's shoulder, seeking comfort and reassurance in his eyes. But they were empty, locked on the wall across the Great Hall, and he looked almost as if he was not there, as if he was gone. The only sign that he was alive was the trembling of his eyelashes, when he blinked. He didn't bother to put his arm around his sister; he just kept on looking at the wall, as if he was expecting Fred to come out of it.

"George," she whispered softly, her voice distant. "George, please, look at me."

He did so – two pairs of light brown eyes met and sunk into one another, but there was no difference. He still felt so absent that it hurt.

"George…"

She could not plead him to talk to her, because she knew that he was not able to. She didn't think _she_ wanted to talk to anyone right now. But seeing him ache like that… it was unbearable for her. She could not remember a time when he wasn't all smiling and cheerful, and right now he was a mess.

And, if she had to be sincere, so was she.

She lifted her head off his shoulder and patted him lightly, then turned to meet her mother's eyes. They were filled with tears, her lips were trembling and yet she seemed to be there for her daughter. So, instead of trying to comfort George – something she was unable to do – Ginny hid her face in her mother's shoulder and broke down.

She cried for what seemed to be ages, and, when there were no tears left, she just sat there silently, with her head on Molly's shoulder. They had won the battle, they had won the fight, but in a way they had lost even more. She tried to be happy, she did, and she tried really hard to smile, to meet people's gazes, to see the silver lining… That night, the silver lining was enormous, it was as big as a highway, but the darkness around it was so stiff and scary that it wouldn't let Ginny walk towards the light she _knew_ shined somewhere in the distance.

"Hey," a voice said and she felt a familiar touch on her shoulder interrupting her thoughts. She looked up to see Harry, his green eyes tired and filled with sorrow. "Can I… can we talk?"

She knew what he was going to say. Now that the war was over and Voldemort was no longer a threat for her, he wanted to be with her again. But she wasn't sure she wanted it – right now all she wanted was to have Fred back. And yeah, she loved Harry with all her heart; she was sure about that… But right now she didn't even want to think about relationships. She nodded anyway and stood up, following him to the door, where he stopped and took both her hands in his.

"You okay?" he asked. His eyes were soft when he pulled her into a comforting friendly hug.

Suddenly emotions washed over her – the horror of seeing him lying lifeless in Hagrid's arms, the following relief of watching him step into the fight, the fear for him she felt when he was fighting Voldemort and the silent feeling of triumph after that… And she couldn't hold her tears back, her arms came up around his neck and she cried again, without saying a word. She could not remember crying as much as she did tonight…

When she was finally able to talk again, there were no words left to speak. Ginny simply looked into Harry's eyes and, trying hard not to break down again, asked: "Are _**you**_ okay?"

"Yeah, I'm fine," he answered, a bit startled by seeing her cry like that.

"You're bleeding."

"I didn't mean that."

"I know. And I'm not okay, Harry, how could I be? He's…"

_Gone_, she meant to say, but the word hung on her tongue and she was unable to speak it. But Harry understood, he always understood.

"Gin…"

Neither of them knew what to say. She didn't feel like talking at all, she just wanted to go somewhere and be alone, and try to get all this tears out of her system… And he, he wanted to say how much he loved her, how much he had missed her, how much he needed her right now… but the moment just didn't seem right, with her crying over her brother…

He just kept on holding her for a few moments, thinking about Fred, and Remus, and Tonks… people he loved so much it was almost indescribable, people he had lost… The boy who was a brother to him; the parents of his godson and the last one of the people that had known his own parents… Harry had lost all that. He was used to the grief, it seemed like his constant company by now – it was hard to remember a time when he didn't feel like breaking down to tears at the thought of someone gone, who he used to love…

Actually, he did remember such a time. It was in the end of the last school year when he had felt happy – obliviously happy, carefree and… loved. That feeling had been gone for almost an year and now it was back in his arms.

Ginny.

But she was pulling away. He let her go and looked in her eyes, seeking the answer of his unspoken question. But he didn't find it there, in fact, all he found were the tears she had managed to hold back and the overwhelming pain she felt.

"I was wondering," he started. He had to say it, otherwise he would go crazy. And no, it wasn't the right moment, but from now on all the moments were going to be wrong, so what the hell? "I mean… you and I…"

"Harry," she interrupted him, biting her lip. "Not now, okay? Please. Just give me time. Right now I'm such a mess… I can't be… I can't be with you, I can't be with anyone. I need to do this alone, okay? If you help me make the baby steps now, I'll never be able to stand on my own. I'll always depend on you to help me when it gets hard, I'll always look for you when I think of Fred, and I don't want that to happen."

"You can always depend on me," he answered. "I'll be there."

She tried to smile, but it didn't work out, so she decided not to pretend.

"I know you'll be, that's not what bothers me. I don't want to be so dependent, Harry. I want to go through this alone. I need to do it by myself."

"You're saying…" His voice broke and he tried to look for reassurance in her eyes. "You don't want to be with me, is this what you're saying?"

"I'm saying not now," she corrected him, trying to get a hold on herself. "I'm saying that I need to be on my own now. This is too much, Harry… It's just too much, with Fred gone, and Remus and Tonks gone, and Colin gone, this is too much, I can't… I can't be in a relationship right now. This has nothing to do with you, okay?"

If only there was some way to do this without hurting him. She could see how much he longed to be with her, to touch her, to kiss her, to comfort her, to help her get through the day… But she didn't want any help. It hurt so much… she didn't want Harry to have to feel her pain. He had been through enough.

"Yeah," he mumbled dully.

"You know I love you. You know I do," she pleaded. She didn't want to hurt him.

He smiled weakly and brushed a kiss on her forehead.

"I know. And… I'm going to give you as much time as you want. Just… if you need me… I'll be there, Gin. I'll be waiting."

"Thank you."

He kept his eyes on hers for a moment and then whispered: "And I love you, too."

Her lips touched his for no longer than a moment and then she walked back into the Great Hall to join her family. Harry watched her go, a little smile on his lips, and then went to sit with Ron and Hermione.

He was ready to give her time. He knew what it was like, losing someone you love that much. He knew the feeling of wanting to be alone, he knew too well. He had felt the same – like the rest of the world didn't know what it was like, as if no one had ever been there… when it was him who suffered such loss for the first time, he just wanted to be left alone. He remembered well the time when Sirius had died – all he wanted was to have him back and he didn't care what the world did, the world just didn't understand him.

And now Ginny was going through this. He was willing to give her as much time as she needed, but he wasn't willing to let her lose herself completely in the grief.

He loved her too much to let her do this to herself.


End file.
